Samantha Rhinow

To my not so chronic illness

You were always there, decided who I was and who I'll be. You gave me security even though you were the one who made me unsafe. I don't want you to leave me but I know you have to. It doesn't make sense to me how I hate you but at the same time I can't imagine a life without you. I'm listening to sad love songs and think of you which is completely insane but it's how I feel at the moment. You are a part of me - a big part. And I can't help feeling like I'm loosing this part of myself and I don't know how to fill that void. I'm afraid of keeping you but I'm also afraid of loosing you. I don't know who I am without you. I don't even completely know who I am with you present. I have to make decisions because of you that nobody at my age should have to make. You never brought anything good yet I feel myself clinging to you as if you're my lifeline. I don't know what I'm doing. You were always there and soon, you won't be anymore. And I have no damn clue what that means for me. 

Alle Rechte an diesem Beitrag liegen beim Autoren. Der Beitrag wurde auf vom Autor eingeschickt Samantha Rhinow.
Veröffentlicht auf am 15.11.2023.


Leserkommentare (1)

Alle Leserkommentare anzeigen!

Deine Meinung:

Deine Meinung ist uns und den Autoren wichtig! Diese sollte jedoch sachlich sein und nicht die Autoren persönlich beleidigen. Wir behalten uns das Recht vor diese Einträge zu löschen! Dein Kommentar erscheint öffentlich auf der Homepage - Für private Kommentare sende eine Mail an den Autoren!


Vorheriger Titel Nächster Titel

Mehr aus der Kategorie "Philosophisches" (Gedichte in englischer Sprache)

Weitere Beiträge von Samantha Rhinow

Hat Dir dieser Beitrag gefallen?
Dann schau Dir doch mal diese Vorschläge an:

I loved you - Samantha Rhinow (Liebeskummer)
A special moment - Helga Edelsfeld (Philosophisches)
Flying home - Inge Offermann (Allgemein)